istherelifeafter50

I don’t sleep anymore, at least not without the aid of sleeping aids like Celestial Sleepytime tea or a mild sleeping tablet. Once you get over fifty your body reminds you of the frailties of life, most of which you keep to yourself lest others find you less than perfect.

My hair is falling out. I have male pattern baldness. Now having shaved my head on a couple of occasions I know I have an ugly bald head. Life just seems to be so unfair. Why was I subject to the gene pool that dictated I go bald instead of maintaining my beautiful flowing thick red locks?

I have a cyst on my forehead. A lump the size of a pea to me but according to my doctor is not even worth examining. Every spring I have an out break of psoriasis across the bridge of my nose and eyelids (and strangely enough the back of my knees!) requiring special creams. Certain teeth ache more than others suggesting future problems. Having already received five crowns and an under the gum teeth scraping over the last couple of years that is something I’ll put off a little longer.

I have developed a snapping scapula on my right shoulder that causes my shoulder blades to be further apart than the average persons and aches constantly just from daily use. Because of it my neck muscles are constantly bunched to compensate for the lack of power in the right shoulder. It prohibits a fool range of motion in the joint, I can’t turn my head, do push ups or lift weights with behind the head movement.

I managed to develop a hiatel hernia, right under the sternum. It makes the extra weight that I’m battling (down 20 pounds since the first of the year) extend further as I have no muscle wall to hide it behind. Again the doctor pronounces it is inoperable, just strengthen the muscle. However it prohibits me from sit ups or crunches as that just pushed the hernia out further like some alien being attempting to disembowel me from inside out. My personal trainer has me doing lots of excercises where I suck the belly button into my backbone and I swim often.

Over the last couple of years I have developed some type of prostate problem. It is enlarged slightly; I know because I monitor how I pee. It gets me up at night and sometimes it is a steady flow other times barely a dribble. So I know that at some point I’m going to have a problem. Other than that it works just fine and I keep telling the wife she better take advantage while its available. I have had constipation problems since I was a young lad, and now monitor the bran content in my diet regularly. Having had hemorrhoid problems on and off over the years this is a must.

My back and legs ache when I run. I’m sure the extra weight contributes to the knee pain but it’s a catch twenty two. You got to move to lose the flab so what do you do but move, take Aleve and try to forget the frailties. I hike often and am always getting blackened toe nails that take forever to peel off and grow back. Skin flaps have developed on my inner thighs and rub off and bleed when I walk, run or hike unless I use Vaseline and long shorts! I have to use special scrubs to ward off the little imperfections that grow on my sides and arms, and to keep the bottom of my feet from cracking.

For those of you that read this and have yet to discover the age of fifty enjoy life while you are younger because as you get older it takes a lot more out of your physical body to still enjoy the wonderful things you do and take for granted as a young person. Even those of us that are relatively fit at the half century mark find out the physical limitations that our human bodies impose, whether we like it or not.